For this series, I get to preach on the weekly topic, then we have lunch and discussion after. This is a good format for us right now. My prayer is that 2 groups form off of this 4 week study together and we take on various topics as we go. For now, it becomes an "I talk, now you talk" type of format. It is good because pastors do not usually have feedback (and sometimes don't want it) right after a message. In this situation, it is intentional.
As we were going around the table discussion led by our intern pastor, Derrick Wilhelmus (great guy and you should all get to know him), it came my turn to talk about what I really value in life. I do not usually give this much thought but had a generic answer of family and God. I thought I did pretty good but then SARAH says, "Dad, I think everyone would say that, so what else is really important." My reply was, "Tracey, your daughter is bullying me!" Yep, that is exactly what I said to everyone at the table, got some laughs and ready to move on. But...SARAH the BULLY would not let it go. She said, "no really, dad, what else?" I had to stop and think for a little. What was really important? What values do I hold high enough that I make them my own, act consistently in them, and ready to argue or fight mercilessly over?
Two such values came to mind...
1. I value more than anything else, trust. I know this and I have instilled it in my daughter Sarah. Sarah can handle anything but if you say, "I don't trust you or trust what you did," it destroys her. When she does something inconsistent with her character, she is messed up...just like her daddy. I value trust because I value strong relationships that trust each other enough to talk openly about anything and everything in life. If I have that, I am sailing! When that trust is broken or the other person does not place the same value on trust, I can become very defeated.
I can also place so much trust in someone that I miss stuff. I want to believe everything said and done that I can be gullible at times. This is not cool but admittedly true of me. I think that is why God gave me the wife I have. She is pretty good at helping me see more clearly at times. I do not always give her credit for that but I know that is a strength about her that makes me wiser for having her in my life.
2. I value loyalty. I know this because I have always tried to by a loyal person to those I worked for...to a fault I might add. I was so loyal to one employer that I didn't know when to quit when that was what he really wanted me to do. I worked super, extra hard to make him happy only to become more frustrated. During that time, my wife would say, "Why are you even trying so hard? He doesn't seem to care, so why should you?" She didn't understand the high value I placed on loyalty...to a fault! ;-) So...Tracey was right, but so was I! (or something like that...)
