What is going on?!! I feel completely out of control and unable to focus as we head toward our final moments at Fair Oaks Church.
My wife called me after rehearsal tonight and asked me to go for ice cream. What a nice idea and wonderful treat because...I LOVE ICE CREAM!!! She was being very kind and showing love to doing something I love to do. What a sweet woman! Everything was going great! Birds were singing, we were holding hands while running through a meadow, church bells were ringing, love was in the air, people we didn't even know were giving us fist bumps on the way into the ice cream shop, then...I opened my mouth! What is wrong with me and why am I stressing out? She was trying to help me relax and relieve some stress but I was a complete JERK! I cannot believe I am allowing myself to get so worked up about nothing. Those who know us would not even believe I was panicking over things. I need to get control over myself and let God work in my heart and mind. Only then will I have peace to enjoy my life and wife again. I pray I have the wisdom to rely on God now for what is going to happen because I can do nothing on my own.
Lord, help me to live a life that is pleasing to You. Help me to love my wife and daughters in such a way that I will deal with my own issues and talk to my pastor and friends to get the strength and support You provide through them. Help me to keep trusting in You because I foolishly try to keep doing things my own way. You are my God, Creator, Savoir, King and Father. You know the future and You know what is best for me. Live in and through me because I am useless without You. I love and adore you, your servant, Roy. Amen and Amen!
